What happens to bored husbands in Wal-mart

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What happens to bored husbands in Wal-mart

Postby Ulinki » Tue Feb 27, 2007 5:21 pm

Couldnt pass up sharing this, LOL


WHAT HAPPENS TO BORED HUSBANDS IN WAL*MART

Ever wonder what happens when you get separated from your Husband in Wal-Mart?

The following letter was sent to a long time patron of a local Wal-Mart Store.

After receiving this letter, she vowed that she would NEVER take her husband shopping with her again!!!

January 12, 2006

Re: Mr. Bill Fenton: Multiple Complaints

Dear Mrs. Fenton,

Over the past six months, your husband, Mr. Bill Fenton has been causing quite a commotion in our store. We cannot tolerate this type of behavior and have considered banning the entire family from shopping in any of our stores We have documented all incidents on our video surveillance equipment. Three of our clerks are attending counseling from the trouble your husband Has caused. All complaints againstMr.Fenton have been compiled and are listed below.

15 Things Mr. Bill Fenton has done while his spouse is shopping:

1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they weren't looking.

2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in House wares to go off at 5-minute intervals.

3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the restrooms.

4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, "Code 3 in house wares!" . And watched what happened.

5. August 4: Went to the Service Desk and asked to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

6. September 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

7. September 15: Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. September 23: When a clerk asks if they can help him, he begins to cry and asks "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"

9. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, and picked his nose.

10. November 10: While handling guns in the hunting department, asked the clerk if he knows where the antidepressants are.

11. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme.

12. December 6: In the auto department, practiced his "Madonna look" using different size funnels.

13. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browse through, yelled "PICK ME! PICK ME!"

14. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumes the fetal position and screams "NO! NO! It's those voices again!!!!"

(And, last, but not least!)

15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door and waited awhile; then, yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
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Postby Dashun » Wed Feb 28, 2007 3:00 am

rofl. that's awesome.
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Postby Carlisa » Wed Feb 28, 2007 8:49 am

My husband would do some of that. He goes into the store and set off ALL the singing toys at the same time if he can. Very annoying.


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Re: What happens to bored husbands in Wal-mart

Postby Blabberpuss » Wed Feb 28, 2007 9:59 am

Ulinki wrote:15. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door and waited awhile; then, yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here!"
This one alone was worth the price for admission.
... like a speeding car with jammed door locks, cut brake lines, a dead steering wheel, and air vents that pump nitrous oxide. Everyone is dimly aware the country is heading for the edge of a cliff, but no one can muster the energy to search for alternatives.
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Postby Forcogar » Tue Mar 06, 2007 1:03 am

Speaking of wal-mart check out this knock off lol

Big Box Mart (Jibjab)
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Postby Dekayd » Tue Mar 06, 2007 3:53 pm

Funny stuff, read it before, but without the husband added in. Before it was just "15 Fun things to do in Walmart" :P
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